Never more shall I see her again.

I recieved the phone call no one wants to hear. The phone call that tells you that someone close to you has died.

My friend has died by her own hand and nothing anyone can say can make it better. She is gone and never again will I see her smile, never again will I hear her voice raised in song. I rage against her for dying. I rage against the Gods of this world for letting her die. But most of all I rage against myself for hating her for dying by her own hand, for dying without fighting, for taking the cowards way out. I hate myself for hating her. I hate myself for not catching on. I should've known better, I SHOULD HAVE FUCKING BEEN THERE FOR HER! I know that I couldn't have been there, I know that no one caught the signs, that no one might have even known there was signs. Little comfort does this give me. I sit here and rage against the dying of a light, I scream my fury to the uncaring skies, I try to drown my sorrow in sound. Yet nothing I do will change the fact she is dead and nothing I can do will change the facts dead is dead and there is nothing I can do.

I hate this goddamn world and it's hatred and it's insecurities. I hate the people who sneer at people who leave this world by their own hand. I hate those who will say she deserves no pity.

I grieve for her, not for the fact she killed herself, but for the fact that she felt she had nothing else she could do. I grieve for the fact that she felt she had no one to turn to. I grieve for the fact that no one could give the comfort she needed.
ALL YOU WHO WOULD NOT GRIEVE FOR HER I SAY FUCK YOU!

May she shine forever in our hearts and may we never forget her.